Cranky Christian

Going to church doesn't make you a good person any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.  -unknown


Being born and raised a Methodist is the luckiest thing that has ever happened to me.  It is a religion that encourages independent thinking, doesn't claim to be the one and only keeper of the "truth" and welcomes all...especially the sinners (and let's face it...we're all sinners in one way or other-some of us just don't admit it).  Granted, over the course of my life, my church's views have become increasingly liberal , which thrills me to no end and keeps me coming back.  I know that no matter what I do or think, I am always loved and welcome.  God/Allah/Buddha (choose the name of your higher power) loves me NO MATTER WHAT.

A person who has been very dear to me but who will remain unnamed recently proclaimed that he/she was a good Christian...because he/she goes to church all the time and because he/she reads the Bible.  This, followed by a diatribe about how he/she has been faking his/her "love" for me for the last 15 years and that I was a terrible person because I'm a procrastinator and a horrible housekeeper and that I love my pets too much and that I'm a terrible mother, blah-blah-blah (vomit) made me reflect upon what makes a person a good Christian...or just a plain old good person.   I've been active in my church for most of my life, but I'll be the first to tell you that I'm not always a good person.  On the other hand, some of the most loving, generous, non-judgemental and forgiving people I have ever known have very rarely or never attended church.  There's two kinds of sin according to the book of "Leah's World as She Sees It":  sins of the body and sins of the heart.  I'm way more worried about what's in my heart than I am about whether I'm smoking, drinking, fornicating (not that I am...no such luck), etc.  Aren't those things better than lying, betrayal, cheating and stealing?  Yes, I've been guilty of all these things during my life, too...but I spend most of my reflective time focusing on how I can improve on my sins of the heart.  That doesn't leave much time for all my other sins.  And when I am confronted by those who think they're superior to me because they have hidden all their faults and look really good on the outside, I get cranky...really cranky...and there ain't many people happy when Leah's cranky.

I couldn't care less if when I die (or even while I'm alive), people fault me for my sins of the body, because in the long run, I know that God, Allah, Buddah (and all the other names we have for God that I can't think of right now) loves me and everyone regardless of our religion (wow-there's a topic I can't wait to write about), regardless of our habits, regardless of our sexual orientation, regardless of how we keep our house or how much we love our pets (ooooooh...I am so bitter about that one) regardless of any of our sins...be they of the body or the heart (although I have a really hard time trying to swallow the thought that God loved Hitler and my first husband).  I want people to remember me for being a loud, sometimes cranky and loving lunatic!